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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25845523">Humanity</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/bathmathnath/pseuds/bathmathnath'>bathmathnath</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Things that take place in Vesuvia [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>The Arcana (Visual Novel)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Eventual Smut, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Human Valdemar, Post-Canon, Valdemar is a bit ooc but hey to romance the Quaestor you had to take some creative licenses</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 05:08:59</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>9,228</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25845523</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/bathmathnath/pseuds/bathmathnath</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When i broke the devil's chains off of the infamous Quaestor Valdemar's body i thought they were gone for good, they seemed to vanish in the air, i thought that was it, they had lost too much of their humanity to still be able to exist without feeding off of the devil's dark energy. I saved the world, yes, but i couldn't forget the look in their red eyes right before they vanished, fear... i don't regret doing it, but watching them like that, more human than ever... struck me. I wonder what happened to them after that.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Apprentice/Valdemar (The Arcana), Valdemar (The Arcana)/Reader</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Things that take place in Vesuvia [2]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1834060</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>50</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. Learning how to live again</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When i broke the devil's chains off of the infamous Quaestor Valdemar's body i thought they were gone for good, they seemed to vanish in the air and i thought that was it, they had lost too much of their humanity to still be able to exist without feeding off of the devil's dark energy.</p><p>I saved the world, yes, but i couldn't forget the look in their red eyes right before they vanished, fear. I don't regret doing it, but watching them like that, more human than ever... struck me. I wonder what happened to them after that.</p><p>I asked Julian about them, how they were as a doctor, how they were as a person, or well... human-passing demon?</p><p>Julian didn't seem comfortable talking about those times, i decided not to push, I'm sure he had seen many things he'd rather forget when the plague claimed so many Vesuvian lives. Yet once we've been out for a couple drinks at the rowdy raven, after a few salty bitters he was the one who brought it up.</p><p>"We did so many horrible things at that time, they made it seem like i had no choice, like it was for a greater good, for science, but they were just toying with lives for their own sick obsession with death, old and young all the same, if the plague claimed them then they just became another of Valdemar's subjects, human toys..." His blue eyes burned mine with emotions too intense for me to bear, i had to look away, look at the table between us. Guilt, regret, pain, shame, fear for whatever they've done under Valdemar's tutoring. "I should've said no, but i was too desperate to find a cure, i convinced myself it'll pay our in the end."</p><p>"I'm so sorry for bringing back those memories." i placed my hand over his, my throat felt tight. </p><p>"It's okay, let me walk you home, this part of the town it's dangerous at night." We both downed our drinks and i put on my coat before leaving.</p><p>He left me at the magic shop, the light was off and i knew I'd find it empty since Asra had left this morning, he had asked me to go with him, before i would've jump at the idea of him finally bringing me with him but after saving the world and exploring magical realms I decided that i had had enough adventures for a while. </p><p>After hugging Julian goodbye i went inside, with a flick of my wrist all the lights turned on. It was quiet and calm inside the shop, the smell of wood, various spices and scented candles, dirt and also metals. It smelled familiar, like home. Dropping my coat on a nearby chair i went upstairs to fix myself some tea to help me sleep.</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>Opened my eyes to the sound of rain, strange, it didn't seem like it would rain that night when Julian and i were walking towards the shop, the night air was chill and calm, no scent of rain. The sound was very strong and it seemed to get stronger and stronger. Getting up i looked out of the window, couldn't see anything, it seemed like everything outside was swallowed by a too-thick white fog.</p><p>I looked around the room, something didn't feel right.</p><p>No.</p><p>Something was very wrong. This wasn't the shop, this was the arcana realm, my magic told me so, it felt more reachable than it usually did at the mortal realm.</p><p>I felt pulled towards the nightstand were i kept Asra's old tarot deck, i shuffled them a bit and pulled out a card.</p><p>Death, reversed. Resistance to change, inner purging.</p><p>But what exactly was it trying to tell me, i listened closely to the whisper of the arcana. I heard a distant voice, muffled, the sound of the rain didn't help either.</p><p>THUMP.</p><p>Wait... that sound did not come from the card, it seemed to come from downstairs. I summoned my magic to the tip of my fingers, whispered a silence spell so my footsteps wouldn't make a sound. I descended the shop's stairs still in my pijamas and stood behind the curtain separating me from the shop's lobby trying to hear something else, nothing. Slowly I moved the purple curtain slightly to the side to catch a glimpse of the shop, looking as calm as ever.</p><p>I stepped forward, still on guard, my hands raised up to my sides but saw nothing, i looked around behind the counter and checked behind every chair and curtain with my heart racing yet found nothing.</p><p>I went to the door and felt every hair in my body stand on end, getting behind the counter i summoned my magic and with a silently casted spell the door opened slowly, revealing a figure at the foot of the door, slumped on the floor, it didn't move. I stood there, waiting for three long minutes and then headed towards it, it was a person covered only by a worn out brown piece of fabric, i brought them inside and went to close the door quickly, rain still roaring outside.</p><p>No, it was not rain i realized, it was... bones, bones falling from the sky, and the fog was thick, thick enough to make me throw a coughing fit just by inhaling it. I closed the door and casted a cross-me-not spell.</p><p>I approached the person lying on the floor, looking for vital signs, i couldn't perceive their breathing yet did sensed a weak pulse. They were covered by a thick lair of ash-like dust. They had very long limbs but were really thin, i wasn't exactly the muscular type but still, managed to carry them upstairs bridal style, hoping at least there was running water in this realm. </p><p>The bathroom didn't look changed at all, i took them to my room and went to fix the tub, once it had filled with water, not too cold and not too hot and went back to where the stranger was lying, ash staining the sheets and scooped them up again to take them to the bathroom, once we were there i used some magic to strip them off their brown attire and carefully laid them in the water, a little bit of water toppled the bathtub wetting me too, their feet hanged out of the tub and they were in a sitting like position, water reaching their chest.</p><p>I grabbed a towel and wet it in warm water and started rubbing their shoulders, their body was no longer visible, the water had quickly turn grey, i sank my other hand in it and casted a purifying spell, their form under water became visible again yet the water remained a little bit dirty.</p><p>To my horror the more i scrubbed them the more i found slash-like wounds all over their arms, shoulders and neck. Washing the towel once again i started carefully rubbing their face, their eyebrows, eyelids, trying to get as much dust out of them as i could, their mouth, nose and even inside their nostrils and ears. They had those same wounds on their cheeks and forehead, burns and bruises all over their face.</p><p>Poor thing. How did they even get this wounded? Maybe it was the monsters that lurked the magical realm, how did they get in here? where are they from? how old are they? how long they've been here? i had so many questions. </p><p>Why was i brought here, to them?</p><p>I carefully washed their head and scrubbed the rest of their body, their feet were so wounded, as if they had walked over broken glass.</p><p>Their whole body was covered in slashes and burns, barely an inch of untouched skin was visible, it was horrendous, what creature could do something like this?</p><p>When i was finished i scoop them out of the tub, took them to the room and laid them over the pillows.</p><p>"Shit I'm a mess" I notice the front of my pijamas and my pijama pants were completely soaked. I looked inside the closet and found my every day clothes hanging there, I quickly put them on, throwing glances to the mangled body laying in the bed. I had tried to avoid looking at their private parts as much as i could, yet i could see they had kind of ambiguous genitals, maybe they were intersexual?</p><p>i poured rubbing alcohol over a piece of gauze and carefully stared cleaning their wounds. After the first contact to one of the wounds on their chin i felt something weakly gripping the front of my shirt and heard a pained growl.</p><p>"I'm so sorry, I'm trying to clean your wounds, I'm not trying to hurt you dear" I said in the most soothing voice i could manage. "Please relax"</p><p>Their hand fell to the side, their breathing that was then barely noticeable now seemed a little bit more ragged but still slow and weak. I did my best to clean all the wounds, their eyes remained closed the whole time.</p><p>"I can fix them... with magic, is that okay with you?" </p><p>"Pl... Ease" </p><p>I carefully ran my hands over each wound closing them, from their face, neck and shoulder, their thin chest until i got to their knees, i looked up and saw two red eyes staring at me.</p><p>Then it hit me.</p><p>This face was a familiar one.</p><p>Blood leaving my face i instinctively threw my body back, away from them, pressing my back against the bedroom door. Shit, shit, shit, shit.</p><p>"It... hurts... it... hu..." their eyes fell closed again. But they shivered and whispered. "Cold"</p><p>Trying to calm my running thoughts i took a couple of deep breathes.</p><p>I broke their chains, they're no longer tied to the devil's needs, plus i stopped the devil, he's trapped now for a long long time.</p><p>That doesn't mean they won't want to hurt you know.</p><p>Yes, but look at them, they're deeply wounded, they can barely move.</p><p>I slowly approached them again and started healing them again, they sighed weakly.</p><p>"Warmth"</p><p>Oh my, this is what i did when i broke their chains? They've been wandering around trapped in the magical realm for how long now? Time doesn't work here as it work in the mortal realm, but in the human world... it had been months ago when we stopped the devil's plans. When i reached Valdemar's feet I doubted, maybe i should leave this wounds open till I'm sure they wont attack me... i shook my head, i can't do that, they're in so much pain, i can't be that cruel.</p><p>With that i healed the last of their wounds. They seemed to be asleep so i went to the kitchen and made some tea and grabbed some analgesics and a glass of water. Returning to the room i sighed in relieve to find them exactly where i left them.</p><p>Placed the cup of tea in the nightstand and took the glass of water.</p><p>"Hey" I whispered and touched their shoulder gently, they jumped slightly to the touch and i immediately rose to my feet, alert.</p><p>They opened their eyes slowly, looking at me through their long lashes. Their lips looked pale and dry, some bruises remained but at least they were recognizable now.</p><p>"I brought some analgesics and water" They seemed to take a while to process my words, and then they gave a small almost imperceptible nod, i sat back next to them slowly, carefully holding them around their shoulder i brought them to a sitting position and they hissed.</p><p>"Sorry, i don't want you to choke on water."</p><p>I held the analgesic to their mouth but they rejected it with a weak shake of their head </p><p>"Dry throat." they hoarsed. Oh, right, the dust, yeah.</p><p>I pressed the glass to their lips, my hand coming to hold the back of their head and titled it slightly, when the water touched their lips they slurped eagerly and then started coughing. I put the glass aside, rubbing their back.</p><p>"Easy there" </p><p>"More" They growled. Alright, jeez.</p><p>Once again I poured the water into their mouth and this time they drank it all. The tea now was not so hot so instead of going to the kitchen to get more water i made them take the analgesic with tea, it would help them relax anyways.</p><p>They took a sip of the tea and their face contorned.</p><p>"You don't like it?" </p><p>"It's... strong. Sweet." They said, their throat was still a bit sored i figured, but they could speak better now.</p><p>"Valdemar... How long have you been here?" I asked carefully.</p><p>They frowned.</p><p>"Weeks." They said, carefully, eyeing me.</p><p>"It's been months dear"</p><p>The look on their face, surprised, incredulous... devastated. I shouldn't feel bad, they were devastated cause they failed to end the world for fuck's sake, yet they seemed so weak, so helpless, yes, they were bad before, but now without the devil's influence over them maybe they had a second chance, like Volta and Vlastomil, they too had a hard time adapting to being mortal again but they were getting there, slowly... why should them be any different?</p><p>"You're still alive Magician, so i assume you and your... crew, stopped the devil." They said after a long silence.</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>"And the others...?"</p><p>"Lucio, Volta, Valerius and Vlastomil were freed from their deals. Vulgora turned into a swarm of beetles a ran away, their chains were probably broken too when the devil was stopped, we don't know if they're alive though."</p><p>"I am still in the magical realm."</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>"If it's been months then... What are you doing here Magician? I don't think you were looking for me."</p><p>I reached for the card in the nightstand.</p><p>"Death brought me here. Even if you're now a mortal, you still have a connection with your patron arcana, they brought me here to you, in my sleep. We need to take you back to the mortal realm... Is it safe enough to do so?"</p><p>They stayed silent.</p><p>"Why would i go back?"</p><p>"Here is not safe"</p><p>"Oh i know that, but there isn't either." Okay they had a point, everyone hated them back there, but i wasn't going to let them get hurt, I'd ask Nadia to protect them, just like she did with Volta and Vlastomil, yet... Volta and Vlastomil were disliked before but not as much as the infamous Quaestor.</p><p>"Please Valdemar, come with me, i won't tell anybody if you don't want them to know you're alive yet"</p><p>"What do you gain from doing that? How do i know you're not tricking me?"</p><p>"How can i know you won't try to stab me in my sleep once we get there?" </p><p>"You can't." They answered frankly.</p><p>"Exactly, you're going to have to trust the person who just saved your ass in the magical realm."</p><p> </p><p>Three months have passed, we went back to the mortal realm, i hid them in the store till Asra came back and i had to tell them all about it, but i did convince him to keep it secret, still he didn't trust Valdemar, not one bit.</p><p>"Asra" I sighed, He and Valdemar had been engaging in a staring contest for the last ten minutes while we had breakfast.</p><p>Valdemar was in much better form now but still weak and too skinny, i could see their collarbones poking from their skin. Their skin, we discovered, was not so greenish anymore, it was actually brown colored skin with an olive undertone, yet their eyes and teeth remained the same, they now wore some old clothes Asra had in his closet, although they were too long for them. Their hair reached their shoulders and was thin, a little wavy and it was a dirty dark blonde color.</p><p>"Are you sure you'll be okay staying with them today?" Asra asked still looking at Valdemar who stared back while slowly chewing their breakfast.</p><p>"You ask me the same thing every single day, you know i will."</p><p>"Don't worry magician's teacher, i don't bite." They said too innocently to be genuine.</p><p>I rolled my eyes.</p><p>"Please don't fight." i sighed.</p><p>"I gotta go, you sure you don't want me to cancel the meeting?" Asra whispered close to my face, their hands on my shoulder.</p><p>I could feel Valdemar's eyes watching us intently.</p><p>"Trust me, I'll be fine, They've been here for months now, if they wanted to hurt me they would've done it by now." I stroked my master's cheek lovingly. "I got it all under control"</p><p>With a defeated sigh he parted. We spent the next five minutes eating in silence till Valdemar decided to break it.</p><p>"Are you two intimate with each other?" Valdemar asked, their curious eyes looking at me.</p><p>They had been staying with me the past months, the reason why i now sleep in Asra's room while Valdemar sleeps in my old room, after they were more recovered and could do things on their own i started talking to them about Vesuvia's current state, what was everyone up to, what had changed. They asked lots of questions about what happened after i broke them from the devil's chains, i told them every single detail, they also asked me if someone had taken their place as head physician.</p><p>"Doctor Devorak and i think Doctor Satrinava have been handling the public health issues."</p><p>I have also been teaching them how to do many human things, according to them they didn't need to eat, or sleep or bathe when they were a demon, so they were a little bit... rusted on the daily doings of us humans. I taught them to cook some of my own recipes, they helped me with the store, of course i had to use a glamour on them so people wouldn't recognize them. They still have a great memory and all of their medical knowledge remained, they were of great help when someone came looking for something to ease their pain or to fight insomnia. They knew a lot about plants and seemed to enjoy helping me with watering and taking care of the plants Asra and i keep.</p><p>I have come to notice... Human Valdemar acted a lot like a cat, cautious but curious, reserved.</p><p>"We're very close, yes, but i guess you're asking if we have sex" I answered, they gave a simple 'yes'. "No, we don't have sex, we are just... i don't know, so used to sharing the same space, we are very comfortable with each other."</p><p>"Intimacy. That's very interesting." They hummed, they hadn't finished their sandwich.</p><p>"You need to eat more Valdemar, your body needs it." </p><p>"Oh come on magician, you're not trying to talk to a doctor about bodily needs." They scoffed.</p><p>"If certain doctor wasn't very underweight i wouldn't have to scold them about it. I bet i can see your ribcage clearly from under your skin." </p><p>Their skin got a deeper shade of olive, they seemed a bit distressed, this wasn't a flustered blush, they were blushing out of embarrassment.</p><p>"Just take care okay?" I said softly.</p><p>"Don't see why would you even care about how much or little i eat." They narrowed their eyes at me.</p><p>"We're friends now." I shrugged and picked my plate.</p><p>Today they had decided to spend the day upstairs reading while i handled the store, it was Tuesday so not many people would come, somewhere around evening i decided to close the shop. </p><p>I went upstairs and found Valdemar curled in a chair near the window in my old room, they had one of the scientific books they had asked me to pick up for them, i eyed them, taking in their profile, strong nose bridge, deep olive skin, impossibly long eyelashes that were now fluttering as they were probably dreaming something, their thin frame, bones poking in certain places, they looked so fragile now, their legs were tucked underneath them, the pants too short for their long long legs.</p><p>I should take them shopping, they can't wear Asra's clothes forever. also... How long are they planning to hide here? maybe it was time to talk to Nadia and the others.</p><p>I couldn't help myself, i tucked a strand of hair behind their ear and they lazily opened their eyes, i froze, my fingertips still grazing their skin and then they rubbed their cheek against my palm humming with satisfaction.</p><p>"Warmth" they whispered, the same thing they had said to me all those months ago in the arcana realm. My thumb stroked their cheek and they shivered, eyelashes fluttering.</p><p>"Valdemar" I blurted out.</p><p>"Hmm?" they almost purred.</p><p>"You're touch starved" They opened their eyes wide and pushed my hand away, i stood there watching them open and close their mouths several times until they seemed to give up. They couldn't fight me on that. "That's okay, it's not a bad thing."</p><p>"Oh Magician, that's were you are wrong. This is horrible. This is the worst thing." They hissed through sharp teeth, looking furious.</p><p>"I don't see the problem with it, you're human now Valdemar."</p><p>"That's part of the problem, all these feelings and sensations and all these... questions and worries, i absolutely despise my current state. When i was a demon i couldn't feel the weight of my actions, i couldn't feel shame. I was never touch starved, as a matter of fact i hated being touched, i was untouchable in many ways, i was powerful, never experienced self consciousness or shyness, the human body was a mere vessel, a shell." Their eyes were a little glassy. "What point is there in craving a caress or closure if every single person in the world despises me...? Even i despise myself, you should've left me to die, i was never kind to you, why were you so gentle with me i will never understand." </p><p>"Oh Valdemar, come here" I signalled them to stand up. They looked at me in utter confusion but did it anyways. "I'm going to hug you now, if you have a problem with it you can tell me now" </p><p>I waited for a minute, a minute in which they only stared at me, neutral expression, body a little tense.</p><p>Slowly i stepped closer, not breaking eye contact and slowly brought my hands to their back, resting my head on their chest. My, my, they were so tall. Slowly they lifted their arms and placed them over my shoulders, their chin came to rest over my head and we stayed like that for a while. I was the first one to break away from our embrace and looked them in the eyes once again.</p><p>"I don't despise you, on the contrary Valdemar, i care about you. You may not be the powerful demon you were but I think you're better now, you were alone back then, you weren't you anymore, the person you were before the devil reached you."</p><p>"That was eons ago magician."</p><p>"You can start again now, I'll be with you." The sun was setting, casting orange light into the bedroom. The emotion in Valdemar's eyes was so raw, i could see their fear, they were afraid of having hope, they were confused and felt nobody could like them, they were angry at themselves for wanting to be liked, they were embarrassed and under all of those there was a new emotion in those red eyes that once have felt devoid of all humanity and goodness.</p><p>"Why?" they whispered, voice a little bit shaky from emotion.</p><p>"I simply like to be around you." i whispered honestly and felt a little blush creep to my cheeks. Why am i getting flustered now?</p><p>Suddenly we heard a loud crash and we both jumped, letting each other go, i saw the source of the noise, Malak had crashed straight into the window, i opened it and found the raven held a piece of paper in their mouth. I took it a thanked them and then they left.</p><p>I opened the folded note and read it's content.</p><p>"Well, Asra is not coming home today, come on, I'm starving." I headed towards our little kitchen and started chopping some vegetables. "would you turn on the stove?"</p><p>They walked up to the stove and i heard them whisper.</p><p>"Little magical salamander, could you please light up the stove?" It was adorable, at first the salamander didn't like Valdemar, they tried to prank them or just ignored them, now they were used to the third presence in the house.</p><p>After a while we were eating tortillas in silence. Silence which i decided to break.</p><p>"I was thinking... maybe you should come with me to the market. You can't use Asra's clothes forever, they don't even fit you, you're too tall. And i think you're ready to talk to people as yourself, if you really don't feel safe we can go to the palace, talk to Nadia." I was eyeing their reaction carefully, they seemed to get paler, lips pressed in a tight line. I reached out and touched their arm. "There's nothing to be afraid of."</p><p>"I'm not afraid." They hissed. I signalled them to where their hands were shaking still holding their knife and fork. "This is stupid."</p><p>"What is?"</p><p>"I should not care if I'm alone, if they send me away to isolation. It's ridiculous."</p><p>"Val, humans are social creatures, if you were idk... a spider or something, alright, but you are not, us humans live in communities, we want to get along with people within our community cause we don't want to be alienated. That's pure instinct. The next step is going outside and being yourself, it won't be easy but I'm sure when they see you're not the same person-"</p><p>"Your optimism is ridiculous. You have no idea of all the things I did, some things are unforgivable."</p><p>"You tied me to a table and tried to cut me open, I think I have an idea." </p><p>"And you must be insane to forgive me for it but not everyone is like you MC." </p><p>"What are you going to do? Stay here, hiding forever?"</p><p>"Am i a bother to you here?"</p><p>"That's not what i said, you can stay with me for as long as you want but i want you to truly live."</p><p>"I don't deserve to live."</p><p>"I don't deserve it either, I should be dead remember? i got a second chance."</p><p>"You didn't do the things i did"</p><p>"Valdemar, Death Arcana brought me to where you were so i could save your life, if they can forgive you for helping the devil almost ending the world, merging the realms together, unleashing chaos and disappearing the other Arcana forever then i think there's hope for you still." With that i resumed eating and after a minute or two more of contemplation they did too. "You better finish it all or you won't eat dessert."</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. Company</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>A few days had passed, Asra had gone on one of his adventures once again, things at the shop have been calm but i needed to go to the market to buy food and magic supplies. I had taught Valdemar to sew clothes, they didn't seem very interested in the task but hey, you never know when it might come handy so i insisted and their skilled fingers finished the job in half of the time it would've taken me.</p><p>"I decided I'll go with you, to the market tomorrow" They entered Asra's room where i stayed as i was getting ready to sleep.</p><p>"Really? Oh, Valdemar, that's great" I stood up from the dresser. They seemed determined yet i could perceive the slight tremor in their mouth. "It's going to be fine" I touched their arm, they were holding so much tension in their body.</p><p>I stood there, assuring them that they were safe, for several minutes.</p><p>"I should go." They finally said. </p><p>"Hey, don't overthink this." I said to them before they walked out of the door.</p><p>"I'll try."</p><p> </p><p>I woke up in the middle of the night due to a sound. A thump. Oh gosh now who am i going to have to save? Peeking from my blankets i saw the familiar room, everything seemed the same. Apparently I'm not in the magical realm.</p><p>I jumped from the bed a hurried to the next room and found a messy haired Valdemar standing in the middle of my old room.</p><p>"Hi there." They jumped and turned to me, the bed was a mess of tangled sheets.</p><p>"I couldn't sleep." They whispered, their voice hoarse.</p><p>I sighed and walked up to them.</p><p>"Come on now, get on the bed" They stared at me confused. "Trust me dear" </p><p>"You called me that when you found me the first time, when you didn't know who i was." They said while i slowly guided them to the bed and took the sheets apart so they wouldn't be lying on top of them.</p><p>"Yes."</p><p>"After that you never called me that again." They whispered, sitting in the bed, looking up to me with their big red eyes.</p><p>"You want me to?" </p><p>"Maybe" Was their answer.</p><p>"Lay down dear" They obeyed, i covered them with sheets and crossed all the way to lay on the opposite side of the bed, close enough to feel the heat radiating from them but not touching them, not knowing if they'd be okay with that. They laid unmoving for a while and then turned to face me, i smiled at them, slowly raising my hand to tug their hair behind their ear, letting my fingers wander towards their cheek, their high cheekbones, their straight nose, sharp jaw and prominent chin. "Relax" i whispered to them</p><p>Their eyes fell closed and i continued my attentions to their face, didn't register how long i was doing that, at some point my arm got tired and i fell asleep. Woke up to a face buried on my neck, a pointed nose pressed against my collarbones, a slow steady breathing. Who would've said Valdemar was a cuddler... or more accurately, liked to be cuddled.</p><p>I stayed there for a while, feeling their arms around me, inhaling into their hair. It felt peaceful and calm, they were thin, their body against mine felt so fragile, like a bird's body. I was starting to drift into sleep again when I remembered we had things to do before the shop opened.</p><p>"Val" I whispered, my voice thick with sleep. "Dear, we have to get up"</p><p>I felt their lashes fluttering against my neck, it made me squirm, it tickled. Felt their arms tighten around me and then completely letting me go, they lifted their eyes till we were eye to eye.</p><p>"Morning dear doctor" I said with a smile.</p><p>"Morning magician." We stayed there. "Today is the day" </p><p>"It is Val, let's get ready. You can use the bathroom first." With that we both got up.</p><p> </p><p>The market was crowded today, the first thing on the list was getting Valdemar some clothes, i dragged them into the nearest store and we started looking through piles of clothes.</p><p>"What would you like to wear?" I asked, ignoring how the owner eyed us suspiciously.</p><p>"I don't know, before i wore only my medical attire... I didn't even have to change or shower, i did not even think about what i wore. It feels so strange looking back, like i wasn't really there, my memories i mean, they don't feel like something i lived, i can't recall sensations, smells, hardly recall feeling anything. I was numb, magician"</p><p>"And now?"</p><p>"Now i pay attention to everything, the colors, the scents, the sensations, the taste of food, it had been so long since i felt any of those things that it almost feel like it's the first time."</p><p>"Well I'm glad to have all your first times." I teased and gasped in delight when i saw their face flush deep olive.</p><p>"Disgusting magician, you're so vulgar." They hissed half-heartedly.</p><p>"Oh and who would've thought you were a cuddler Valdemar." I went on with my teasing.</p><p>"Shut it, i was asleep, i didn't know what i was doing." </p><p> </p><p>After getting Valdemar some clothes, Valdemar walked out of the store with a new outfit and two bags full of clothing. They had chosen a simple white turtle neck shirt, loose black pants and black sandals.</p><p>"So now what magician?" </p><p>"Now we're off to the red market to buy some magic supplies and then we're going to the floating market to buy food."</p><p>They seemed more relaxed, people sometimes stared at us but no one came close or questioned us, i ran across a few clients who waved at me, i waved back but didn't stop to greet them, didn't think Valdemar would've enjoyed standing on the side while i chatted. After reaching our final stop we stood there, sweaty and tired, hands full of bags, Valdemar insisted on carrying most of them. </p><p>"You okay? We should stop to grab something to eat and i know the perfect place." </p><p>Yes, you guessed it. The beast bread of Vesuvia.</p><p>"You grab a table, I'll go an order." </p><p>The baker greeted warmly me when i walked up to the stall, leaving Valdemar behind.</p><p>"Lovely Apprentice! i hadn't seen you in a while, is Asra with you?"</p><p>"No, today i came with a friend. We're starving, what do suggest?"</p><p>"I'll have my son bring it to your table"</p><p>I noticed the young boy behind the stall for the first time. Yes, they were definitely related.</p><p>"Oh, hello there, nice to meet you." I waved, then turned to the baker. "What do you have to fight the heat?"</p><p>"Iced tea is okay with you?"</p><p>"Yes, perfect. Thank you!"</p><p>Not even 10 minutes after we had to warm loafs of bread in front of us, one was the traditional pumpkin and spice bread and the other was a cheese filled bread, two iced tea cups. We didn't waste much time and started to eat.</p><p>"How you liked it?" I raised my eyebrow at them.</p><p>"This is very good." They said honestly.</p><p>"Very good? it's the best bread of Vesuvia!" I said throwing my arms in the air. They chuckled. "Hey... i was thinking, maybe we could go to the palace. Talk to Nadia, before rumours start spreading."</p><p>"I think it may be the best if we do, yes."</p><p> </p><p>"Come on Val, we're not there yet" They were 10 steps behind me. "I know these are many stairs but- VAL!" </p><p>I ran when i saw him plummet to the floor, barely reaching to hold them before their head hit concrete floor. Oh no, oh no, oh no. We were almost there, we will have to find him help in the palace, maybe Nazali was there.</p><p>"Up we go" i said as i scooped their skinny body in my arms, they weren't exactly a feather but they weren't heavy either. I continued walking with them in my arms.</p><p>When we reached the Palace doors they growled and opened their eyes.</p><p>"Jesus Val, you passed out on me so i had to carry you the rest of the way or what?" I was drenched in sweat, pretty sure my hair looked like a mess, my cheeks very red for both my blush and the sun.</p><p>They seemed confused for a while and then they jumped, almost bringing me down in the process, i stumbled leaving them on the floor and they stood on their feet, fixing their clothing, looking at me with an embarrassed expression.</p><p>"I'm sorry for that Magician, you shouldn't have bothered."</p><p>"Well we're here now, let's go inside, Nazali can check up on you and tell us that you need to eat more so you won't be passing out on me in the center of Vesuvia."</p><p>"Magician wait." thin fingers wrapped tightly around my waist. I could see how anxious they were. "If I'm imprisoned... you were so kind to me, what i meant to say is that i, well, I'm trying to express my-"</p><p>"Hey, you're welcome. And Nadia won't imprison you dear, trust me on this." We walked up to the guards. "We're here to see the countess, they come with me."</p><p>"Magician" One of the guards greeted me with a nod of their head. "Quaestor...? is that you?" The tension in their voice and their slight tremor was enough to tell us they were scared. </p><p>"Please, we're in a hurry." I intervened. </p><p>"Uh... right, right, let them in." He signalled to the other guards who pushed the doors open. I took Valdemar's hand and dragged them in.</p><p>The Countess was waiting for us in the gardens, i knew the halls well enough by now, Valdemar did too, so we had no problem getting there, the servants stared at us and whispered, hid when we got close enough. Valdemar was tense next to me, they didn't look anyone in the eyes.</p><p>When we crossed the door to the gardens we spotted Nadia's characteristic hair, she had her back turned on us and was talking to a little orange haired woman, when we got close enough the woman turned their head towards us, mismatched eyes widened at the sight of the former Quaestor of Vesuvia.</p><p>"My! Oh my! it is the Quaestor! well not the Quaestor anymore, it is Valdema the not-Quaestor, Volta is very surprised oh, you're with the little magician that freed Volta, you look changed, i don't smell the devil on you."</p><p>Nadia turned her head, eyes wide, eyeing Valdemar cautiously, then her eyes landed on me and they softened a little bit.</p><p>"Hi MC"</p><p>"Nadia, how are you?" </p><p>"Well I'm intrigued, didn't expect you here and certainly not with company, we should talk over a cup of tea."</p><p>"And sweets!" Volta exclaimed.</p><p> </p><p>"So you've been among us for a while now, Valdemar."</p><p>"Almost four months, Countess" Valdemar has been nervous and tense while i told Nadia the story of how i found them and everything that came after. I could see them tapping their leg nervously under the table, Volta had listened very attentively the whole story.</p><p>"Oh the magician freed me too but Volta didn't get hurt by that, Volta felt good"</p><p>"I thought i was too far gone to be human again, for days after i felt like my whole body was a burning mass of flesh and bones, it was agonic. And then i collapsed, next thing i know is i felt warmth, that was the first thing i truly felt when i came to myself again. And there was MC."</p><p>"I'm glad MC found you in time and brought you here with us. Volta, Vlastomil, Valerius and Lucio were also freed from their chains, they all have been working very hard to make amends with the people and themselves, i could offer you counseling if you want, i can give you a job, not your old position but maybe in time if the people of Vesuvia regain the trust in you we could let them decide that."</p><p>"Thank you countess, your kindness is highly appreciated."</p><p>It was moving, seeing the tension leave Valdemar's shoulders and their little smile, i had come to really like that smile.</p><p>"Oh, Volta can barely recognize you now Valdemar, you are so different"</p><p>"Actually Nadia, is Nazali here? i would like them to check up on Valdemar, they passed out on their way here"</p><p>"Of course, follow me, you too can stay here and finish your tea, I have a few more questions for Valdemar.</p><p> </p><p>Later on the sun was setting and we were walking around the palace gardens, just the two of us, Nadia had to leave to sign some important papers and Volta left, she said something about dinner.</p><p>"Would you like to go to the old lab? Maybe you want to take some of your things with you"</p><p>"You mean the dungeons? no, i don't want to go back there." I had to tilt my head back so much to look at them, the orange light casting shadows on their face, they looked alive, human and gorgeous. "I want to leave that behind and start again... I would very much appreciate your help and most importantly your company MC." I smiled at them. </p><p>"Of course" The intensity behind our words hanged between us like electricity.</p><p>They leaned in and shared a sweet kiss in the palace gardens, i don't know which one of us closed the space left but when our lips met it was soft and innocent, gentle, very gentle. My heart was fluttering like crazy, my cheeks colored and their olive ones too. </p><p>"I think we should go home then."</p><p>"Yes magician, let's go home" And hand in hand we walked back to the palace.</p>
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<a name="section0003"><h2>3. Making advances</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>4 months have passed, Valdemar started working with Julian on the public hospital of Vesuvia, it was weird for them to work for the one who used to be their apprentice and Julian wasn't very pleased when Nadia told them who he'd be working with, they had gone impossibly pale.</p><p>Well... nobody was actually delighted with Valdemar's presence around them but slowly they came to accept it.</p><p>As for our current relationship status... I don't know what to call it, you could say we're dating, we go on dates, we share kisses and talk about many things, we went stargazing to the fields and i show them my favorite stores and food stalls in the city.</p><p>Oh, we sleep together. And they're definitely the little spoon when we cuddle, i don't mind, feeling their back pressed tightly against my soft chest, i get to smell their hair and hold them, caress them. </p><p>It was the beginning of summer here in Vesuvia, hot Vesuvian nights had me waking up with damp hair, we had started sleeping with the window open and a spell to keep mosquitoes outside. Asra wasn't home tonight, he was staying at the palace, honestly he just spends a lot of time there now. I don't know if it's because of Valdemar, my master seemed to be avoiding me as well.</p><p>"Are you asleep magician?" Valdemar's voice brought me out of my inner monologue.</p><p>"no dear" I answered, squeezing them in my arms a little bit tighter and then letting go.</p><p>"It's so hot in here." They whined.</p><p>"Yes it's fucking hot. My back is drenched in sweat." And it was true, my robe was starting to stick to my skin.</p><p>"Disgusting"</p><p>"Aren't you a fucking doctor, you've seen, touched and smelled worst things than sweat."</p><p>"Unfortunately you're right." They sighed.</p><p>After a moment of silence i decided to snap.</p><p>"I won't take this anymore" Sitting on the bed, I pulled my robe open and let it fall off of me, throwing it to the floor next to the bed we were sharing.</p><p>They were now laying on their back looking at me, i was only wearing my undergarments, i laid down next to them, my chin resting over their shoulder.</p><p>"Is it okay with you?" i asked.</p><p>"You said it, I've seen worst." They said teasingly.</p><p>"You know, this is why people don't like you." I said hitting them playfully on their stomach.</p><p>"For being honest?"</p><p>"Oh, were you?" i raised my eyebrow at them.</p><p>"Actually no, you're breathtaking magician." </p><p>"Flatterer" I said hiding my face on their neck so they wouldn't see me blushing. "I'm fat."</p><p>"I like that, you're soft." Their hand absent-mindedly started trancing circles on my bare arm, causing my hair to stand on end in goosebumps. They turned to me completely and hugged me tight, face pressed against my neck, i hugged them back.</p><p>We spent 15 minutes like that after they sighed, i was almost asleep but the sound brought me back.</p><p>"I'm sweating." Yes, their hair was starting to get a little damp at the roots.</p><p>"Take off your pajama robe, it helps."</p><p>They stayed silent for a while.</p><p>"Dear magician... if i told you what i feel, you'd probably laugh at me." They said with a sigh.</p><p>"That's probably not true."</p><p>"I'm embarrassed." They confessed.</p><p>"That's fine, perfectly normal and understandable." </p><p>"I worry you won't find me pleasant to look at." They continued.</p><p>"I do too sometimes."</p><p>"But you look... You are full of beauty and life, and I look like one of those spinach noodles."</p><p>I couldn't help it, i really tried to hold back my laughter, but i failed.</p><p>"Oh dear, I've seen you and i think you're beautiful and it's normal to feel shame, it's up to you to decide if the shame overlaps your comfort, either way nobody can't judge you."</p><p>"I guess you're right."</p><p>They sat slowly, carefully and slowly taking their clothes off of their body, staying only in their underwear and then they came to lie down once again next to me, against me, holding me and I held them too. I never knew cuddling each other, while only wearing our underwear would feel so intimate, my cheeks were heating up.</p><p>My hand came to trace their spine with my finger, feeling them shiver against me, i caressed the soft skin, giving them a soft massage, drawing patterns on their skin. Experimentally i dragged my nails slowly all the way to their lower back, blushing like crazy when the smallest of moans escaped them.</p><p>"Sorry" I whispered, unsure of what to do.</p><p>"You can do it again."</p><p>They turned their face to mine and kissed me, i kissed them back, the kiss was slow, wet but not desperate. Again i dragged my nails down their back, this time putting a little more pressure and they bit my lip with a growl. I jumped at the aching sensation of their sharp teeth and tasted my own blood. They parted our lips, breathing faster.</p><p>"Sorry" </p><p>"You can do that again" My voice came out raspy and i pulled them for another kiss.</p><p>We kissed for too long, soon enough hands started to roam skin, their palms made contact with my soft breasts through my underwear, coercing pleased sounds from my throat. My hands roamed their back, their tiny waist, i scratched the skin over their ribs and they moaned, body spasming a little bit, my hands found their hips, feeling their hip bone and feeling a little bit adventurous i went all the way back and started massaging their buttcheeks.</p><p>They made a little yelp of embarrassment and hid their face on my neck, i squeezed and they bit my neck. We were both a panting mess, i could feel how slick I've gotten.</p><p>Their lips had started to roam my neck, kissing and licking their way down to where my neck met my shoulder, hands roaming my whole body, squeezing my soft flesh.</p><p>"Bite me" I pleaded. "Please dear" My hips subconsciously started to grind into theirs, searching for any friction.</p><p>And suddenly i felt cold. I whined, missing their attentions, their closeness.</p><p>They were standing near the window, still panting but looking shaken, and not in a good way, worried i stood up with trembling limbs, they weren't looking at me, trying to slow down their breathing.</p><p>"Dear..." I approached slowly.</p><p>"I'm sorry, I'm... a bit overwhelmed" They seemed to be struggling with the words.</p><p>"You're shaking." </p><p>"I'll be fine in a minute." They said apologetically.</p><p>"Oh my love" i closed the space left between us and grabbed one of their hands between mine. "It's fine, we can cuddle, don't feel like you need to do anything"</p><p>The silence that falls over us is tense, the air charged with our energy, the tension, the fear in Valdemar, my worry. I tug their hand and take them back to the bed with me, close to each other but not tangled.</p><p>Their hands came up to my hair and i see them nibbling their lower lip lost in thought, the caress feels so relaxing, the way the massage and scratch my scalp, and struggle to keep my eyes open.</p><p>"I love you, it's okay, i love you" i manage to whisper before losing myself to sleep.</p><p>Woke up the next morning feeling the weight of what I've said the night before falling on me, nevertheless i did my routine as usual, untangled myself from their embrace, waking them up softly, showering, washing my teeth, eating breakfast and opening the store. </p><p>Valdemar decided they wouldn't need the glamour today, feeling safer now after talking to Nadia. People came in and out of the store a lot of them staring at them intensely, yet demon or not Valdemar was still intimidating enough for them to not ask anything out loud. A lot of them didn't really understand what exactly happened that night at the masquerade.</p><p>Every day i had around 6 tarot readings, sometimes we did birth chart reading and interpretation while I did that Valdemar stayed at the front, behind the counter, selling infusions, potions and other things, they were good at it, most were people walked in, purchased what they wanted and left without much instance. </p><p>When the sun was starting to set we started preparing to close the store, it was quiet and calm.</p><p>"Magician, i think we should talk about yesterday, don't you think?" Valdemar stated while absent-mindedly sweeping the floor.</p><p>"Yes dear but we should do it over a cup of tea after we finish closing the shop, don't you think?" I tried to sound calm but i was not calm.</p><p>"Perfect."</p><p> </p><p>I placed steaming cups of lemon tea in front of us and sat next to them.</p><p>"Alright, let's have a talk" I said.</p><p>"About yesterday i want to apol-" I cut them off with my hand.</p><p>"Don't go that way. I told you-"</p><p>"Let me finish Magician." They sighed and then continued. "I wanted to apologize cause i know i owe you an explanation of why i had that reaction yesterday."</p><p>I listened attentively placing my hand on top of theirs on the table.</p><p>"I'm still trying to cope with all that implies getting back my humanity and mortality, there's no way i would explain to you how it felt to be me before, my demonic body was held together by a shell, that looked like me but felt no different than a shirt you out on, or a mask if you'd like to think of it that way, i could modify it as i pleased, make people see me how i wanted them to see me." They stopped for a moment, studying my reaction.</p><p>"Go on" i encouraged them.</p><p>"My real... form back then, if you could call it like that, was undescribable, myself can't quite remember how it was and if i think about it for too long my head feels like it's going to implode, that affected the way i perceived things, couldn't quite perceive tastes cause i didn't even need to eat, why would i need to savour things? same with my sense of smell. My hearing and sight on the other hand were very, very sharp. Just like i could sense any type of aura or energy or magic around me, couldn't perceive touch either. I believe that all of these were things that i could and did consciously or subconsciously modify."</p><p>"So you're tell me you could change your default settings?" I joked, they looked at me with a blank expression, clearly not understanding it.</p><p>"That's a strange way to put it but yeah, it sort of fits, but i have a feeling you're mocking me. Anyways, there was not trace of humanity left in me, therefore social constructs, those things humans created to comprehend better their own self like gender identity were useless for me, i was beyond that, same with... biological sex."</p><p>Oh, i see where this is coming.</p><p>"I kinda never put my mind into producing... or growing a reproductive system or assigning a gender to my human form after it became just a shell, i can't even be sure of my assigned gender at birth and as a demon i was neutral on it, agender, asexual as well, clearly and completely emotionally numb so no interest in romance either and when you freed me from those chains that kind of... held me together i lost consciousness for what i believe were all those weeks that passed, when i woke up i walked around for a bit inside a storm of ash and bone and feeling my body was shredding itself to pieces while being of fire, that's when i collapsed on your doorstep, fully human once again."</p><p>"You know, i too have been thinking about it, we all thought you were too far gone to survive without the devil's deal feeding you with power, but I believe the energy of the magical realm was what kept you alive, even more cause you were in your patron Arcana's realm" </p><p>"I don't know"</p><p>"I'm curious about something... Did you actually understand anything about magic when you started making deals with the devil?"</p><p>"I clearly did not magician, i probably would have known when to stop."</p><p>"But you got powers, i remember, you were super fast and seemed to be able to appear anywhere and your body... was that only the devil's doing?" I tried to hide the shiver that went through my body remembering the night of the masquerade when i had seen their true form... well, "seen" is an overstatement, i could not even bear to look at it. </p><p>"I tried to become death magician, the deals gave me various abilities but i was not the source of such magic, the devil fed us with power and it became an addiction, I was drunk with the power the devil provided me, i know for sure that i was a doctor when i was human not a magician." They sighed. "I'm telling you all of this cause i believe last night we made some significant advances in our relationship."</p><p>I felt myself blush at the mention of last night, i nodded.</p><p>"And you've seen me naked before, in the magical realm." I nodded again. "And after all I've said, are you still... i mean, do you still want us to make further advances?" Now it was their turn to blush.</p><p>"Yes." It came out breathier that i expected, the blush on both of our faces intensifying. "I like you, very much."</p><p>"Actually, I can recall you saying you love me" </p><p>Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh, my face was on fire.</p><p>"I was expecting you to forget about that." I said hiding my face behind my hands.</p><p>"Now why would i?"</p><p>"Cause i don't recall you saying it back" I looked up at them.</p><p>"You fell asleep quiet fast magician."</p><p>"So did you?" </p><p>We stared at each other intensely for a couple of minutes.</p><p>"My dear magician, it takes a little bit more courage than  i have to be able to express my feelings out loud, i hope I'm not offending you."</p><p>"It's fine" I whispered and gave them a reassuring smile, taking their hand between mine i brought it close to my lips to kiss each of their fingers and their palm. "I can wait for you."</p>
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